Sixteen (and a bit)

I really need to get a handle on these weekly photo updates. My early week 14 and late week 15 pics look like they were taken a month apart. I commit to being on time with my updates as of next week.

Until then, my belly is out! And its a nightmare to dress. I continually feel like I need to "suck it in" and still compare my physique to the women in the gym who are not pregnant. I do not know when my mind will switch gears, but I'm sure that when it does, I'll fall into the neurosis that seems to be so common for my generation. Being neurotic about pregnancy neurosis. Wonderful.

The best tact -yes, I have analysed this and come up with a solution - is to focus on the important stuff. Parenting. To this end I've completed a lovely book which I mentioned in a former blog. It was so eye-opening that I intend to read it cover to cover again - after a short hiatus with something frivolous and easy. Its interesting to me that I've never feared being an inadequate parent, nor that James will be so. But the thought of pregnancy (and the being) has always made me feel disconcerted. I suppose it has to do with the idea that parenting involves a measure of control and decision; whereas, being pregnant involves giving your body over to the development of something entirely foreign for its own benefit, with little to no control. How high my belly sits, when I start to show, whether my hormones make my emotional, spotty or mental are all completely out of my control. Simply, I've become a vessel. And it would seem, that currently, I'm just along for the ride.

Week 16 photo to follow. Tomorrow.